Saturday, March 29, 2014

Good Bye and God Bless You, Bob...We Will Always Love You!!



I’ve been putting off how to even write this post.  At the beginning of my first post, I said I wanted to do my best, to put a positive spin on the Myotonic Muscular Dystrophy – Our Family’s Journey, blog.

So today I decided this would be the day to continue with the posts. I have sad news, yet I am feeling Blessed.  On March 1, 2014, my beloved husband (Bob), whom, I described as David, died, following a courageous battle with complications of Myotonic Muscular Dystrophy.

His epiglottis (the little muscle that keeps food from going into your lungs but down to your stomach) stopped working. He was required to have a feeding tube inserted in August of 2013.

Following that first one,  he was hospitalized two more times, for aspiration pneumonia. Then, this year, he developed pancreatitis. This was probably inherited from his Mother, who survived the surgery quite nicely. This would normally, for everyone else, be a routine stone and gallbladder removal.

He recovered from the initial stone removal in stint insertion, but because of the need to remain off food to resolve the inflammation, was too  weakened for even limited activity. Because of this, his strength waned. 

He was started once again, on the tube feedings and was even up to his maximum daily requirements. Then, one evening he vomited and aspirated. He stopped breathing and despite the hospital’s valiant effort to save him he did not survive the code blue.

I know this sounds very depressing, but please, don’t stop reading.

Once we, as his family, came to accept his death, we were able to reflect on the time we had with him. Bob was very much, a loving Husband,  a devoted Father, a fun loving Grandfather, a cherished Brother, a  loved Brother-in-law,  an Uncle, a Cousin and Friend to so  many. This was made clear to us, at his wake, funeral and memorial service.

During these days, we shared how we were Blessed to have him with us,  how smart, funny, kind and gentle he was to so many during his life with us. Although we will miss him forever, it will be those qualities of his, that will live on in his children, grandchildren and someday great grandchildren.

He fought a hard fight, to remain with us. But there is not one among us, who would wish him back in the condition he was in, at his time of death.

We will always remember the strong, happy, teasing and fun loving man he was. We will continue to do our best to honor his memory, by continuing to live as he would have wanted us to do. All of the qualities he possessed will remain with his family, for as long as we each live, until the end of time.

May he now reside in  grace and peaceful rest in the arms of Our Lord.

God Bless you Bob, We will love you and miss you forever.

Now, to find a new normal....




9 comments:

  1. Kathy, what a beautifully written, emotional and touching tribute to Bob. You are so right, it is the happy, fun loving guy that we will think of when his name is mentioned.

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    1. Thanks Pat, It was tough to think of writing it. But where matters of the heart are concerned it became easy.

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  2. Kathy, what a very beautiful and loving tribute to Bob. Like Pat, I will always remember the many happy times. Campfires, Fundy Trail, P & M's camp, Florida, hockey dances, New River and so many more. Right now, when I think of Bob, the photo that you have in this post is who I see.

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  3. Thanks Monica. Those are the times I think of, too. And that photo is how I remember Bob the most.

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  4. Kathy, although I haven't had the please of meeting you or your beloved Bob, what you wrote was so beautiful. I cannot imagine how hard that must have been for you but believe at the same time it was a bit healing.

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    1. Thanks Trudi,
      It's been tough on us all, but this is part of the healing process for me. And besides he deserved a nice tribute.

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    1. Thank you so much. His was a life wroth celebrating!! :-)

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  6. "He fought a hard fight, to remain with us. But there is not one among us, who would wish him back in the condition he was in, at his time of death."

    - I get it. I completely get it. I wrote about my mother with similar words "As painful as some of the moments were, I thank God for my time with my mother while she was on a ventilator in long-term critical care. My heart knew she couldn’t get better, I couldn’t will it, and all my prayers were “Thy will be done.” I took joy in washing her hair and felt honored to comb it." (http://quest.mda.org/article/beyond-willpower-caring-brother-and-mother-mmd )

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